Lacuna: Document 7

This was found on the right half of Mr. Cedric Daniels: he was apparently left-handed. The letters were made with an “X-acto” knife. He was discovered in a hotel room, wearing a black suit, tie, and sunglasses, and a small two-way in-ear phone.

[[Actor] is sitting in an office cubicle in the center of the stage. His back is to the audience: he faces the computer in front of him. Around the cubicle, there is darkness. He works in silence for about a minute, then there is the sound of a door opening. He looks up, cocks his head, and then returns to work. Forms begin to move in the darkness around the cubicle, and then several emerge into the light. They are all dressed in identical black suits, shirts, ties and sunglasses. They all have identical military-style haircuts, earpieces, and shoulder-holsters. They all speak in unison.]¹

The Men in Black[Actor], you are under arrest for suspicion of treason and terrorism. Please follow us out of the building now. If you come quietly, we will not be forced to restrain you.

[Actor]: Aren’t you going to read me my rights?

The Men in Black: They are not applicable in this circumstance.

[Actor]: Will you show me some identification?

[There is a beat. Then, all the Men in Black simultaneously pull out identical looking identification cards. Another beat, then [Actor] takes the nearest one and inspects it.]

No agency I’ve ever heard of…

Men in Black: Of course not: you are a Civilian. Will you submit to your arrest?

[Actor]: I will not.²

Men in Black: Then we must warn you that we are authorized to use lethal force.

[[Actor] laughs. The Men in Black all pull out identical handguns. [Actor] stands and bats it away and it flies up and across the stage and into the darkness. The Men all fire in unison, but their weapons have no effect (the guns are of course firing blanks). [Actor] laughs again, and raises his right hand, fingers in the shape of a pistol. He “fires” at the nearest Man.]

[Actor]: Bang!

[The Man in Black is thrown backward and crumples to the ground. The actor should have a blood-pack in their chest, and burst it as they fall. [Actor] raises his left hand, also in the shape of a pistol.]

Bang! Bang! Bang! Bangbangbangbangbang!

[The Men in Black all fall. All also have blood-packs, so there should be a lot of red. The lights also go red, and [Actor] raises the index fingers of each “gun” to his face and blows away the “smoke”. Then, he walks offstage.]

At this point, Mr. Daniels, who had already lost a great deal of blood, climbed into the bathtub and slit his left wrist and forearm open vertically.

¹At this point the text transitions from the chest to the legs.

²At this point the text transitions to the arm.

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A Magical Mystery Tour Guide View all posts by MysterMe

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